SQShowSquad
CalendarSign inJoin
Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps
RELEASED·SERIES·EN

Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps

Mon, Feb 26, 2001
  • Comedy
Series · Synopsis

Synopsis

The lives of five loveable, 20-somethings are followed in the northern town of Runcorn in Cheshire, England, where the friends meet often at a local pub to chat about life and love.

Where to watch

Streaming on

  • BBC Choice↗
  • BBC Two↗
  • BBC Three↗
Cast

Top of the call sheet

  • Will Mellor
    Will Mellor
    as Gaz
  • Natalie Casey
    Natalie Casey
    as Donna
  • Freddie Hogan
    Freddie Hogan
    as Billy
  • Georgia Henshaw
    Georgia Henshaw
    as Cassie
  • L
    Luke Gell
    as Tim
Related

If you’re into this…

  • Not Going Out
    Not Going Out
    2006 · series
  • Peep Show
    Peep Show
    2003 · series
  • Undateable
    Undateable
    2014 · series
  • The Inbetweeners
    The Inbetweeners
    2008 · series
  • Lovesick
    Lovesick
    2014 · series
  • Friends from College
    Friends from College
    2017 · series
  • Letterkenny
    Letterkenny
    2016 · series
  • It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
    It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
    2005 · series
  • Man Seeking Woman
    Man Seeking Woman
    2015 · series
  • Platonic
    Platonic
    2023 · series
SQShowSquad
CalendarSign inJoin
Episodes

9 seasons · 76 episodes

Ended · 76 aired
Season 1
6 episodes · 6 aired
▾
  • E1
    Fags, Shags and Kebabs
    Aired · Mon, Feb 26, 2001 · 30m

    Donna needs a man so her mum won't think she's repellent to the opposite sex. Janet wants to help, but discovers that matchmaking can seriously damage your boyfriend.

  • E2
    Spunk
    Aired · Mon, Mar 5, 2001 · 30m

    Jonny tries to be horrible to Janet and fails miserably. Donna is after as much sex with as little commitment as possible. Flo, however, has other plans. Louise discovers that dieting can damage the buttocks.

  • E3
    Bone with the Wind
    Aired · Mon, Mar 12, 2001 · 30m

    When Gaz finds Donna's toothbrush in his flat, he realises he has to stop her 'merging'. Janet's plan to make Jonny fancy her backfires.

  • E4
    Angry Wangry
    Aired · Mon, Mar 19, 2001 · 30m

    Janet is keen to improve her mind, but realises that neither poetry nor biscuits are the answer. Gaz is desperate to feel attractive, and thinks that the best way to accomplish this is to flash his rather underdeveloped chest.

  • E5
    Lard
    Aired · Mon, Mar 26, 2001 · 30m

    Jonny falls for Janet's friend Louise, until his obsession is cured in a revolting manner. Janet decides to become a stand-up comedian. Gaz attempts to manipulate Donna.

  • E6
    Ugly Babies
    Aired · Mon, Apr 2, 2001 · 30m

    Jonny wants some excitement in his life, and when Janet reveals some remarkable news, he gets rather more than he bargained for. Gaz and Donna have a communication problem - she wants to talk and he wants sex. Louise is simply desperate to prove that she is not an idiot.

Season 2
6 episodes · 6 aired
▾
  • E1
    On the Blob
    Aired · Mon, Apr 15, 2002 · 30m

    Gaz runs naked through the streets of Runcorn but still has to face up to Donna's pregnancy. And Louise's psychic powers inspire Jonny to make an unusual career move.

  • E2
    Bungle
    Aired · Mon, Apr 22, 2002 · 30m

    Louise copes with a new boyfriend who is desperate to have sex with her, Janet's dinner party goes awry when Gaz and Donna abuse her trifle, and Jonny finds an unusual way to spend his scratchcard winnings.

  • E3
    Dirty Girls
    Aired · Mon, Apr 29, 2002 · 30m

    Janet rediscovers a love letter from her gorgeous ex and resorts to deception to prevent Jonny becoming jealous. Flo asks Donna to move out so she can set up a massage parlour in her old room. And, unable to decide how to handle her boyfriend, Louise experiments with gay sex.

  • E4
    Vomit
    Aired · Mon, May 6, 2002 · 30m

    Gaz looks after an unwell Jonny, although Donna is worried that his 'illness' is just an excuse to avoid her now that she has moved in. Meanwhile Janet goes too far with her old flame Andy, and Louise discovers there's more to owning a dog than tickling its tummy.

  • E5
    Crusty Curtains
    Aired · Mon, May 13, 2002 · 30m

    Jonny isn't speaking to Janet and taking Gaz's advice only makes things worse. While Louise tries to affect a reconciliation, Donna and Gaz lay down some ground rules for the flat, much to Donna's regret.

  • E6
    Mo Mo and Pigsy
    Aired · Mon, May 20, 2002 · 30m

    In a far from ideal scenario, Donna is living with Jonny, and Janet is living with Gaz. But Jonny thinks Janet has gone to live with Andy and, after being nudged by Donna, goes to get her back. Meanwhile, Louise believes astrology is the answer to everyone's problems.

Season 3
10 episodes · 10 aired
▾
  • E1
    Munch
    Aired · Sun, Feb 23, 2003 · 30m

    Jonny's job hunt is thwarted by a sex-starved cat. Gaz meets the brother he never knew he had, and Louise chokes on her lunch.

  • E2
    Fish
    Aired · Sun, Mar 2, 2003 · 30m

    Janet agrees to give up smoking before she and Jonny get married, but her craving for nicotine makes her turn violent. Gaz is worried that Donna doesn't fancy him any more. Louise agrees to meet a secret admirer.

  • E3
    Kangaroo
    Aired · Sun, Mar 9, 2003 · 30m

    Jonny begs Janet's dad for his blessing for their wedding and gets a great deal more than he bargained for. Donna plans a kinky night in. Louise and David find a new way to play the game of love.

  • E4
    Beastiality
    Aired · Sun, Mar 16, 2003 · 30m

    Munch takes an unusual shine to Donna. Louise has to cope with a dirty secret from David's past.

  • E5
    Hospikal
    Aired · Sun, Mar 23, 2003 · 30m

    Jonny discovers Janet's dad has a dirty secret. Gaz tries to avoid Munch and ends up in hospital. Donna tricks Louise into making up with her.

  • E6
    Dresses, Dresses, Dresses
    Aired · Sun, Mar 30, 2003 · 30m

    Janet, Donna and Louise go shopping for Janet's wedding dress - and get into all kinds of trouble. Jonny and Gaz discover a secret new kind of beer.

  • E7
    Fockin Mokky Bokka
    Aired · Sun, Apr 6, 2003 · 30m

    Jonny gets a job and a sexy offer he can't refuse. Gaz and Donna are up all night for the wrong reasons. David shows Louise a new way to cope with growing old.

  • E8
    Jammy Dodgers
    Aired · Sun, Apr 13, 2003 · 30m

    Janet tries to get passionate with Jonny. Gaz sends Donna out for a night on the town so he can get passionate with himself. Louise has trouble when her new boyfriend comes over all sexy.

  • E9
    Dump
    Aired · Sun, Apr 20, 2003 · 30m

    Janet has decided that the most important thing about getting married is the presents she'll receive, so she makes a list.

  • E10
    Schluballybub
    Aired · Sun, Apr 27, 2003 · 30m

    Gaz has a health scare and blames Donna. Jonny is so interested that he fails to notice that Janet is having second thoughts about marrying him. David finds a new way to test Louise's commitment.

Season 4
8 episodes · 8 aired
▾
  • E1
    Corinthian Dies
    Aired · Sun, Feb 15, 2004 · 30m

    Janet tries to dump Jonny but is upstaged by some pasties. Louise gets revenge on David. Donna finds the courage to pursue a new dream.

  • E2
    Piggy Goes Oink
    Aired · Sun, Feb 22, 2004 · 30m

    Jonny finds himself a new girlfriend. Gaz challenges David to a drinking contest for Donna. A book called Piggy Goes Oink changes Louise's life.

  • E3
    My Delicious Guava
    Aired · Sun, Feb 29, 2004 · 30m

    Jonny ruins his first date with Kate by trying too hard to be manly. A big hairy spider upsets Louise's plan to live with Janet. Gaz bids to become a pop idol.

  • E4
    Cuggles
    Aired · Sun, Mar 7, 2004 · 30m

    Janet and Gaz get much closer than they'd ever intended. Jonny and Kate find out how biscuits can improve your love life, while Louise applies for a lucrative new job.

  • E5
    Purgatory
    Aired · Sun, Mar 14, 2004 · 30m

    Gaz tries to get over his guilt by doing a special thing for Donna. Janet holds a party for Louise's graduation.

  • E6
    Mate Date
    Aired · Sun, Mar 21, 2004 · 30m

    Gaz goes on a quest to split Jonny and Kate. Jonny gets an ultimatum - dump his friends or be dumped. Janet gets a new boss from hell.

  • E7
    Homeless and Horny
    Aired · Sun, Mar 28, 2004 · 30m

    Donna's tutor invites her for extra coaching on his sofa. Gaz has a problem in his trousers. Janet tries to persuade Jonny to come for a bite of her pasties.

  • E8
    Filthy Brunching
    Aired · Sun, Apr 4, 2004 · 30m

    Donna goes for a filthy brunching with her tutor. Gaz finds an unusual solution to his problem. Janet tries to excite Jonny with adventurous sex. Louise gets Jonny into serious trouble with the police.

Season 5
14 episodes · 14 aired
▾
  • E1
    Death
    Aired · Sun, Jan 2, 2005 · 30m

    With Jonny gunned down by the police, Janet struggles to cope with her loss. Louise tries to avoid all blame for the shooting. When grief softens Gaz's sex-drive, Donna finds an inventive way to arouse him.

  • E2
    Nobbly Bobbly
    Aired · Sun, Jan 9, 2005 · 30m

    Donna discovers a dreadful secret in her dead mum's house. Jonny gets scared to leave the house.

  • E3
    Shrink
    Aired · Sun, Jan 16, 2005 · 30m

    Jonny gets some very exciting news. Janet and Gaz take extreme measures to stop Louise blackmailing them. Donna decides to spend, spend, spend, until Gaz drops a bombshell.

  • E4
    Ecuador
    Aired · Sun, Jan 23, 2005 · 30m

    Jonny's new car gives him trouble with women. Donna takes revenge on Gaz for sleeping with Janet. Louise fights dirty to win Jonny's forgiveness for getting him shot.

  • E5
    Potato People
    Aired · Sun, Jan 30, 2005 · 30m

    Jonny and Louise get into trouble with some rampaging kids. Donna and Kelly team up to give Gaz a sexual surprise. Janet tries to get Donna to forgive her for sleeping with Gaz.

  • E6
    Antlers
    Aired · Sun, Feb 6, 2005 · 30m

    Gaz gets into trouble when his plans for Jonny's stag night go seriously wrong. Louise tries to make Janet's hen party into the wildest ever.

  • E7
    Crab
    Aired · Sun, Feb 13, 2005 · 30m

    Janet and Jonny go missing on their wedding day. Gaz resorts to a desperate plan to save the day. Louise gets sentenced for shooting Jonny.

  • E8
    Fat
    Aired · Sun, Feb 20, 2005 · 30m

    Donna has moved up in the bucket world, and is on a mission to sell 4,000 buckets in five days.

  • E9
    Stot or Pronk
    Aired · Sun, Feb 27, 2005 · 30m

    Janet shows off at the pub quiz. Gaz spanks his monkey. And Donna tries to impress Gaz with a facelift.

  • E10
    Who's the Daddy?
    Aired · Sun, Mar 6, 2005 · 30m

    Janet is rushed to hospital, helped by Louise. Gaz lets slip to Jonny that the baby might be his. Donna finally forgives Gaz.

  • E11
    Bababababa
    Aired · Sun, Mar 13, 2005 · 30m

    When Janet becomes a baby bore Jonny takes drastic action to get her attention. Louise tries to bag herself one of Kelly's fellas. Donna and Gaz try their hand at babysitting.

  • E12
    God
    Aired · Sun, Mar 20, 2005 · 30m

    Jonny tries to make his son more exciting. Gaz becomes a new man for Donna by taking Flo's HRT tablets. Louise finds God.

  • E13
    Love 83199
    Aired · Tue, Mar 29, 2005 · 30m

    Jonny bids for a chance at his dream job. Gaz and Donna find their dream house. Louise dates her mobile phone and finally gets herself an amazing boyfriend.

  • E14
    Near, Far
    Aired · Sun, Apr 3, 2005 · 30m

    Jonny goes for his interview at the biscuit factory. Janet gets the chance to be a star. Gaz has to confront his greatest fear - sheep. And Louise struggles to keep Mick.

Season 6
10 episodes · 10 aired
▾
  • E1
    Speedycruise!
    Aired · Sun, Feb 26, 2006 · 30m

    Janet has a dilemma - does she leave her friends and baby for a life of luxury singing on a cruise? Donna becomes rich after her dead mother's money from the house comes through and has a very weird business venture idea.

  • E2
    Goblins
    Aired · Sun, Mar 5, 2006 · 30m

    Janet gets a new job, but Donna's career is on the skids. Louise has a letter from her earth mother - but she can't open it. Jonny campaigns for baby changing facilities at the pub.

  • E3
    Mummy Cupboard
    Aired · Sun, Mar 12, 2006 · 30m

    Gaz decides it's time to make a proper commitment to Donna. Janet tries talking dirty for a living and Louise is in for a shock when she finally meets her real parents.

  • E4
    Cauliflower
    Aired · Sun, Mar 19, 2006 · 30m

    Donna gives Gaz the answer to his marriage proposal. Janet finds a new way of providing for her child - the only problem is, it's illegal. Louise meets her real dad for the first time, but he is more interested in getting to know Jonny.

  • E5
    Drunk
    Aired · Sun, Mar 26, 2006 · 30m

    Jonny is reeling after being chatted up by Louise's Dad. He decides to become more macho, but his plan backfires with shocking consequences. Louise is feeling let down by her Dad and becomes a really bad alcoholic. And Donna refuses to have Gaz's baby, leaving him only one option for getting the child he longs for.

  • E6
    Croppity Crops
    Aired · Sun, Apr 2, 2006 · 30m

    Janet is reeling that Gaz tried to take Corinthian and decides to increase security in the home. Jonny gets a job as a farmer. Donna persuades Gaz to try tantric sex, but he gets hooked on it, much to her frustration. Louise wants a new family and she knows exactly where to find one.

  • E7
    Finger Sniffing
    Aired · Sun, Apr 9, 2006 · 30m

    Janet and Donna compete for a job managing the pub. Louise buys a car with her mother's legacy. Jonny realises that Gaz is the father of Corinthian and gives him to Gaz, until Gaz reveals that Corinthian can't be his due to his low sperm count.

  • E8
    War, Hurrgh!
    Aired · Sun, Apr 16, 2006 · 30m

    Janet starts her job as manager of The Archer and gives the pub a World War Two theme to appeal to the grey pound. Donna is intent on revenge, Jonny tries to help Gaz become a dad and Louise becomes a prostitute.

  • E9
    Closing Time
    Aired · Sun, Apr 23, 2006 · 30m

    Janet tries desperately to find a way of keeping the pub open. Louise is feeling unwell and Kelly thinks she recognises the symptoms. Jonny thinks he has fallen in love with Gaz. And Donna's little brother causes chaos when he comes to stay.

  • E10
    When Janet Killed Jonny
    Aired · Sun, Apr 30, 2006 · 30m

    The Archer is about to be demolished in this special horror episode. The gang decide to break in for one last night together, but once inside, strange things start to happen and they find themselves trapped inside a pub that seems intent on killing them, one by one.

Season 7
8 episodes · 8 aired
▾
  • E1
    When Jonny Met Sharky
    Aired · Sun, Jan 13, 2008 · 30m

    Originally broadcast live episode of the sitcom about the lives and loves of five twenty-somethings. Jonny wins a competition to go shark-jumping in Hawaii.

  • E2
    Dabdaa!
    Aired · Sun, Jan 20, 2008 · 30m

    With Jonny dead, Janet decides to get through the five stages of grief quickly. Gaz finds a way to help her.

  • E3
    Homophobia Is Gay
    Aired · Sun, Jan 27, 2008 · 30m

    Janet takes desperate action to stay safe for Corinthian. Gaz seeks a new friend who can replace Jonny.

  • E4
    Dead Jonny Walking
    Aired · Sun, Feb 10, 2008 · 30m

    Louise is distressed to learn she's carrying a girl, not a boy. After Donna fires Tim she is forced to work with depressed Janet and mad Munch.

  • E5
    Here Bums the Bride
    Aired · Sun, Feb 17, 2008 · 30m

    Gaz works through his list of three things he must do before he dies. Donna gets work in a charity shop to try to overcome her fear of death. Louise stumbles across a massive secret about Corinthian.

  • E6
    Six Months Later
    Aired · Sun, Feb 24, 2008 · 30m

    When the bailiffs come to repossess her house, Janet has just 24 hours to get some money. Louise tries to help. Gaz struggles to babysit his son.

  • E7
    African Death Face
    Aired · Sun, Mar 2, 2008 · 30m

    While Donna is in London getting her dream job, Janet and Gaz are left alone together. Louise's contractions start.

  • E8
    Borry
    Aired · Sun, Mar 9, 2008 · 30m

    With Donna about to go to London, the secret of Janet and Gaz's relationship comes out. Then Donna reveals she's got a secret of her own. Louise finally has her baby, enthusiastically assisted by Munch.

Season 8
8 episodes · 8 aired
▾
  • E1
    Candle
    Aired · Sun, Mar 15, 2009 · 30m

    It's Janet and Gaz's first night as a couple after Donna has moved to London to be with Wesley. Janet objects when Gaz arranges for his ex-girlfriend to babysit Corinthian.

  • E2
    Gazman
    Aired · Sun, Mar 22, 2009 · 30m

    A homesick Donna visits Runcorn with tales of her fabulous new boyfriend, Gaz applies for parental responsibility of Corinthian and Louise struggles with motherhood.

  • E3
    Flan Van
    Aired · Sun, Mar 29, 2009 · 30m

    Janet decides she wants to become a Police Community Support Officer, Wesley attempts to win Donna back and Donna is furious when Gaz tries to set her up with a tramp.

  • E4
    Ello Ello
    Aired · Sun, Apr 5, 2009 · 30m

    Donna and Gaz decide they are not ready to have a happy divorce yet, while Wesley tries to fit in with the gang.

  • E5
    D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
    Aired · Sun, Apr 19, 2009 · 30m

    Donna and Gaz have decided to get divorced and it takes them on a path down memory lane, looking back at their relationship in a series of fantasies and flashbacks.

  • E6
    Val Doonican
    Aired · Sun, Apr 26, 2009 · 30m

    Now that Gaz and Donna are divorced, Gaz decides it is time to propose to Janet. Scared that she is losing all her friends, Donna helps him organise the proposal.

  • E7
    You Decide
    Aired · Sun, May 3, 2009 · 30m

    Gaz is torn between Janet and Donna, and things come to a head when Janet finds him and Donna in bed together. Louise tells Tim she is desperate for a boyfriend.

  • E8
    Keep on Running
    Aired · Sun, May 10, 2009 · 30m

    Donna and Janet are furious with Gaz and demand he decides who he wants by three o'clock. He decides to audition them both.

Season 9
6 episodes · 6 aired
▾
  • E1
    Nil by Muff
    Aired · Tue, Apr 26, 2011 · 30m

    Gaz struggles with his paralysis, as Billy tries to befriend him. Tim is shaken by the arrival of his younger sister Cassie.

  • E2
    Cheese Toastie
    Aired · Tue, Apr 26, 2011 · 30m

    Gaz struggles to get used to his metrosexual carer Billy, Donna signs on the dole and Tim gives sister Cassie a makeover.

  • E3
    Trial Schmile
    Aired · Tue, May 3, 2011 · 30m

    Gaz tries to help Billy get a trial for Runcorn Rovers, while Donna re-examines her life and finds inner peace.

  • E4
    The Gaz-Bot
    Aired · Tue, May 10, 2011 · 30m

    Donna helps Gaz in his ambition to become a Paralympian, Billy goes on a date with Cassie and Tim wonders if he's gay or not.

  • E5
    Shagger
    Aired · Tue, May 17, 2011 · 30m

    Tim uses a phone app to find a boyfriend, Cassie tries to impress Billy by dressing as a WAG and Gaz decides he must walk again.

  • E6
    This Is Your Life
    Aired · Tue, May 24, 2011 · 30m

    After Donna's revelation that she may be pregnant, she and Gaz have big decisions ahead. Tim lands a date with Leonard.