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Richie buys visits a sex shop to buy some Pakistani pheromones promised to drive women wild, but his night at the pub is less than successful.

When the gas man comes around to investigate some suspicious figures, Richie and Eddie have 6 hours, 27 minutes to disconnect the line they illegally connected to next door's mains, which means breaking into the house of the fearsome Mr Rottweiler and his new lady friend.

Eddie comes home broke, having spent the pairs' money on pornography to someday show his grandchildren and a large bet on the Miss World contest. The two watch with bated breath as Richie laments his life of unappreciated servitude and Eddie tries to ignore him.

An gypsy warns Richie that he will die within 3 days.

Having agreed to mind their landlord's shop, the lads are soon at odds with the local community, as well as a gang of looters.

The saddest man on Earth has a birthday. Can it get any worse? Richie discovers to his cost that it can.

With the aid of modern technology, the Linneker dating agency gives Richie the chance to achieve his life's ambition - to have sex. But will he succeed? If the plot flops, Eddie's on hand to take advantage.

Richie and Eddie's TV is taken away. Before the evening is out, they could become chess grand masters or, failing that, go completely bonkers.

Richie and Eddie catch a burglar in the act and resolve to him and flee with his sack of stolen goods, if only they can keep the police off their backs.

Richie helps the police with their enquiries, meets a war veteran, and continues to have trouble with the opposite sex.

Richie discovers a baby on the doorstep.

Richie and Eddie decide to spend two weeks camping in the country, in an inadequate tent, with no food, no money and no chance of survival.

Richie Richard and Eddie Hitler are trapped on a Ferris Wheel - unaware that it's due to be demolished the next morning. They're forced into putting up with one another but thankfully for Eddie, he hasn't forgotten his booze!

Following a nasty incident with three small children and a pitchfork on Halloween, Eddie and Richie come to realise the cash potential of trick-or-treating - especially if an electric cattle prod is used on the unwilling.

Richie and Eddie prepare for their holiday with a vigorous new fitness regime. But not all goes according to plan.

Richie has devised a get-rich-quick plan of his own.

Eddie and Richie get their revenge on Taffy O'Jones by stealing his honeymoon tickets and making off to the Marvelloso Spendido Hotel to pose as Mr and Mrs O'Jones.

When the local carnival inevitably descends into rioting, Richie loots a BBC van, scoring himself a camera. He and Eddie set about filming their own television shows, but the project rapidly derails into a scheme to blackmail the Prime Minister.